Meetups & Mixers Hosting Guide

Part V: Resources & Templates

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In this section, we provide a collection of resources to help you when starting your event.

  • Use a combination of Event Templates and Event Policies to develop the language for your event posts.

  • Use the Promotional Language to get the word out about your event

  • In the Activities section you’ll find a selection of conversation starters and activities to get people talking

  • In Organizer Tools, you’ll find things to make running the event easier, including an Event Organizer Checklist and Music Playlists to set the mood.

Template Event Descriptions

  • Join us for another fun night out at the ENM Social! We are located at [VENUE NAME] which has hosted many great ENM events in the past. It's a great space to talk where we can hear each other and they have a few games to play as well. Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) is the practice of having multiple connections with the consent of all parties involved. Relationship dynamics are different for everybody, and we want to create a space to learn more and get to know other people who are exploring it too. Feel free to stop by whenever you can make it and make a new friend! We are here for the connections!

  • Welcome to the Non-monogamy Happy Hour!

    • No cover or cost to attend. (No ticket or rsvp required)

    • We strongly encourage people to take a rapid covid test before attending.

    • Come anytime [START TIME] - [END TIME]

    • Reach us in the chat or by email at: [CONTACT INFO]

    About Non-monogamy Happy Hour

    We welcome all the non-monogamous, poly-curious, relationship anarchists, queer-of-all-sorts, supportive friends, singles, couples, polycules, et al. to help us create a safe space for all orientations and all kink and gender identities. To this end, please don’t yuck someone else’s yum and practice enthusiastic consent [ask before initiating any physical contact (even a hug) and feel empowered to respond, "no thank you" to asks from others]

    Non-monogamy Happy Hour brings together the non-monogamous community, from long-timers to those just thinking about exploring, for an afternoon of mingling, friend-making and catching up.

    No cover or cost to attend, but food and drinks are available to order. - If you're able, please support the folks at [VENUE NAME] who make this event possible.

    Have a drink and a bite, and meet some amazing folks. Menus will be posted when they're available.

  • This event is for non-monogamous people (and allies) who want to build community while in nature.

    We will start promptly at [START TIME]. You’re welcome to show up at [15 MINUTES BEFORE START TIME] to meet and mingle with other hikers. If you’re going to be late, please let me know by no later than [45 MINUTES BEFORE START TIME]

    Check trail details below. Make sure the hike is suited to your current level of fitness. If you’re planning to bring a dog, you’ll need to check whether the trail is dog-friendly. Kids are welcome.

    FAQ

    [LINK TO FAQ PAGE, EXAMPLE]

    Hope to see you there!

    DIRECTIONS & TRAIL INFO

    [GOOGLE MAPS LINK]

    [TRAIL NAME]

    [ALLTRAILS.COM LINK]

  • Join Us for a day in the sun!

    Non-monogamy Community Picnic is a daytime picnic in one of our favorite local parks! Come through at your convenience and bring something to nibble on!

    MEETING SPOT: [GOOGLE MAPS LINK]

    DON’T FORGET!:

    • Blanket or chair

    • Sunscreen

    • Jacket

    • lunch

    • Sharable snacks - if you want!

Template Event Policies

Consider adding this language to your event invitation, sending it to attendees prior to your event, or reading it as part of your opening circle.

  • We strive to be a safe, welcoming gathering space and a home for diverse non-monogamous folks from all over the surrounding area. We welcome all those who consider themselves non-monogamous, those who are curious about non-monogamy, and supportive friends, lovers, and allies – regardless of age, gender, gender identity, orientation, relationship status, or any other aspect of your identity.

    We always enforce a set of house rules in order to maintain a safe space:

    • Respectful Behavior towards hosts and other guests is required; anyone who violates these rules may be asked to leave the event.

    • Expectations: Check your expectations at the door. Being at this event does not signal sexual availability or indicate any aspect of sexual orientation. Our events are about developing friendships and connections within the community. This is a no cruising event, in order to maintain a comfortable atmosphere for our guests.

    • Safe Spaces: We strive to create a safe space for people of ALL identities, including those who do not identify as polyamorous.

    • No photography, video, or recording of any kind is allowed without prior verbal consent of all parties involved.

    • Verbal Consent: Please be sure to ask and wait for a yes before hugging or initiating any physical contact, and encourage each other to speak openly about consent and personal boundaries. This helps foster a culture where personal boundaries are supported and attendees are empowered to speak confidently of their limits. (i.e. “Can I give you a hug?” “No thank you, but I would love a handshake.”)

    Here’s an example printout of “house rules” that can be displayed at your event.

  • Consent is an important part of the culture of our event. Please ask before initiating any physical contact (even a hug) and only act on an enthusiastic yes. Feel empowered to respond, "no thank you" to asks from others.

    • There [WILL/WILL NOT] be a testing requirement at this month's event. We [ENCOURAGE / REQUIRE] attendees to take a rapid test before attending. Please stay home if you feel unwell.

    • Please stay up to date on vaccinations if your health allows it. [CDC - COVID-19]

    • If you develop symptoms following our event, please reach out to us at [CONTACT INFORMATION] so we can inform the community about any possible exposure.

    • We trust you to make the best decisions for your body. If you are unable to attend for any reason (risk tolerance, schedule, transportation, technology, etc) we see you. - Please reach out if there's anything that might be done to accommodate [CONTACT INFO] - We recognize this event may not be accessible for everybody, be we do want it to be as accessible as possible.

  • If your event is dog-friendly

    • This is a dog-friendly event, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s a friendly event for every dog. If you know that your pooch has a difficult time being around crowds, or other dogs, please consider alternatives for them.

    • Dogs must be kept on a leash at all times.

    If kids are allowed

    • This is a family-friendly event, so keep it PG-13 out there.

    Scents

    • Please be conscious of attendees who may have scent sensitivities. Please only smoke in designated areas and avoid wearing scents such as perfumes or cologne.

Promotional Language

This template language is intended to give you a head start organizing your event. Feel free to take what works for you and remix it as you see fit!

  • Are you ready to explore something new? A nonmonogamy mixer is coming soon to [City]!

    This event is a great opportunity for those who are curious about nonmonogamy and want to meet like-minded people in a fun and relaxed environment.

    The mixer will feature [Activities], [Food/Beverage], and conversation with experts and experienced participants in the nonmonogamy community.

    The event will be held on [Date], and tickets are available now at [Link]. Come join us and explore something new!

  • Hello, I am reaching out to you as a host of [ORGANIZATION NAME] to let you know about an exciting new nonmonogamous mixer that will be starting soon. Our event is called [EVENT NAME] and it will be happening on [DATE] at [LOCATION]. I’d love to share the event information with your community. Please let me know if there’s a good way to share this new event with your community.

Activities

These activities are intended to facilitate conversation and connection between attendees. They’re great ways to help folks break the ice!

  • Consider printing some conversation prompts to leave around your event (or keep some on standby for yourself as a host!) Here are some conversation prompts we love:

  • This Mingle Bingo Generator from My Free Bingo Cards allows you to create a custom ‘Bingo Card’ for your event. Get people to check off squares by finding people at the event who match the description.

    Ideas things to put on a bingo card for a non-monogamy event include:

    • Somebody new to non-monogamy

    • Has more than three partners

    • Relationship style informed by relationship anarchist

    • Has read Poly-Secure

    • Relationship style informed by solo-poly

    • Here with more than one partner

    • Has brought more than one partner to a family/work function

    • Wearing Bisexual colors (blue, purple, pink)

    • Wearing an infinity symbol

    • Is monogamous

    • Lives with their partners

    • Poly with children

    • Is poly-saturated

    • Has read More Then Two

    • Is Vegan

    • Is open to dating

Organizer Tools

Here are a few more tools for organizers to make planning and running your event a breeze.

    1. Research communities/events in your region: Do this before starting your event to avoid conflicts.

    2. Develop a mission statement for the event: This doesn’t need to be extensive, but take some time to think through why you want to host the event, and what you want people to take away from it.

    3. Choose a venue: Find a venue that will be a good fit for your event. If your event repeats, consider whether you’ll be at the same venue each time.

    4. Establish a timeline for the event: For re-occuring events, set a schedule for when your event occurs. The more regular your event is, the easier it will be for people to follow.

    5. Create a list of potential guests: Develop a list of the people you want to be at your event (even if nobody else shows up) and send them personal invitations.

    6. Announce your event date: Let people know about your event at least 2 weeks before it happens.

    7. Write out your event language and post your event: You can use the templates in this section to develop language for your event.

    8. Advertise the event: You can use the templates in this section to develop language for your event invitations.

    9. Event Day: Greet guests, and keep an eye out for anybody who may need extra support.

    10. Follow-up with guests after the event: Following up with guests after your event is a great way to get feedback, and let people know about upcoming events. This is also a good chance for people to report any issues they had at your event.

  • For a social mixer, it is important to choose a music playlist that sets the right atmosphere without being too distracting. Music without too many lyrics, such as light jazz, house, or instrumental music, can work well. Alternatively, music with lyrics in another language, like Nigerian disco or other world music, can also be effective. A Spotify premium account (or something similar) will allow you to avoid ad-breaks.

    Below you’ll find a few examples of music to help find the right sound for your event. As you host more events, you'll get a better sense of what music works best for your event.

  • Welcome to our new [EVENT NAME]! My name is [NAME] and I’ll be your host for this event. If you have any questions or concerns, please do not hesitate to find me. [Have others on your team introduce themselves if applicable] We are so excited to bring the non-monogamous community together for an afternoon of mingling and connecting. Here, you will find a safe and welcoming space to foster community and learn more about different relationship dynamics. We hope you will leave here with new friends and a better connection to the local non-monogamous lifestyle. So grab a drink, make a new connection, and enjoy the experience!

    Before we jump back into the event, let’s go over our house rules so everybody is on the same page.

    [READ HOUSE RULES]

    [ANY ADDITIONAL ANNOUNCEMENTS]

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